SLIFE: Completed
It took a while, but Zine #2 is finally finished!
I thought this would be a more structured approach compared to the first one, but it was more like a stream of consciousness, which feels oddly cathartic.
There is constant tension between what I believe my creative style to be, and perhaps the type of logic and structure my thoughts enjoy employing--or perhaps what society and success dictate.
The past decade seems to have ushered in the association of "being intentional" with wellness, but I must admit with some amusement that I seem to subscribe to the old notion of YOLO. My default emotional processing style cannot be bothered with calculating or weighing intent against outcome. I much prefer going with the flow.
Adulthood, however, scorns such an irresponsible approach to life. So too does logic, which I also adore. Like most things, then, a crossroads. While a rational approach to life is potentially tangibly and mentally rewarding--there is a level of tantalizing satisfaction with observing patterns of strategic input correlating with specific kinds of output--I stubbornly hold onto the notion that an emotional and somewhat childish one is more honest and enriching.
Another belief I hold is that all things are optimized through appropriate shifts in balance, however, so I abhor the thought of leaning in either direction for too long.
I think this zine reflects that. The process began rather systematically: I threw all the photos I selected from last year into a program called Obsidian (giving it a try; not sure if I'll regularly use it), and then began to flesh out the skeleton of the zine.
I knew I wanted it to be a commentary on how I define "life" at 31. Shades of life, slices of life, Joon's life, slow down, life: SLIFE. I also knew I wanted this zine to feature more poetry-adjacent writing. This seems to be my default preference for articulating emotions. I am fine to verbally articulate my thoughts and emotions, but it has never translated quite well to text; something is always amiss, and a bit of vomit dwells in my esophagus. When it comes to poetry-esque writing, I find it to be more comfortable. Weeks later, it will all be the same slightly corny and vomit-inducing dribble, but at the very least, it feels authentic to me. More importantly, it is extremely cathartic in the moment.
I approach these poem-esques (I feel uncomfortable calling them as such since I know they often deviate from 'proper' structures and approaches) the same way I currently approach my street photography: on-the-go, one-and-done. I believe I tweaked 2-3 words in the final InDesign file, but they are largely untouched, which is what I believe adds to the catharsis. There is a level of unabashed honesty that this kind of approach offers, along with clearer self-analysis and reflection.
Eventually, I would like to experience a more disciplined and calculating approach in all my creative endeavours, but I am also learning to lean into what seems to be my natural affinity. I have never enjoyed manufacturing moments, emotions, thoughts, and by extension, photos, concepts, writings, and videos.
So, to be quite honest, I have no idea whether this zine is stronger than the first. I can't even recall what I wrote about off the top of my head. It does feel different, and it felt more difficult to complete, as I have been distracted from Welcome to 30 as of late.
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SLIFE: Some thoughts on life.
Takeaways after creating this: I cling to joy as my reason to continue living. I have many gripes with what I believe are the defining features of being human. I often feel at odds with those around me, as well as what is within me. I still yearn for a community I can call home and identify with. I have an inkling of what that community is, but know that I will not be able to name that community until we experience more cultural swings. I don't know how to reach out in the meantime, so I continue to create and post things online.
Age fascinates me. Interactions between generations.
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May look into a local printer this time. Some people have expressed interest in grabbing a physical copy. Had not considered shipping out physical copies, need some guidance. Probably end up YouTubing, but it would be great to pick someone's brain in a live context, so please feel free to reach out if you have experience and some time to teach me.
Have a fantastic day.
Joon.
Images that didn’t make the zine, but I enjoy:
